Today we're filled with something, but we'll never tell you what. We tie ourselves up in knots as we debate the difference between a vine, a rope and a twist and become truly unhinged due to sugar intake. This episode contains: excessive mouth noises, friend slapping, falling diplomas and Billy Madison Syndrome and AI says "includes a humorous segment about lighting candy on fire."
catchy song about groundwater
Molly 0:04
I'm Molly And I'm Matthew, and this is spilled milk, the show where we cook something delicious, eat it all, and you can't have any. And
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:10
today, that is not true, because we're doing candy robes, and about 30 minutes from now, we're going to be feeling pretty sick. Right now. I'm very sick.
Molly 0:19
For yourself, I'm so excited. Okay, so today's show was suggested by listener Alia. Do you think I'm pronouncing that right?
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:26
I think that's my that was my guess. Listener Alia wrote in and said, Did you know that there's a lot of candy ropes out there and, like, more so than I think, any other suggestion we've ever gotten for the show. I was like, well, we need to talk about this immediately. This is important breaking news. So I, like, I went out and bought a bunch of, like, sent listener Leah back a photo of a bunch of candy ropes. It's still gonna be months before this episode airs, because we record ahead. But yeah, like, I was pretty proud of myself. I
Molly 0:52
mean, just for an instant, we are on top of the trend. Yeah. I mean,
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:56
honestly, I don't know how new these things are. I think, like, some of them are years old, you did the yes, okay, right? I have some knowledge to give you. Okay, so what's your what's your candy rope memory lane.
Molly 1:07
So honestly, the first thing that came to mind was nerds ropes, right? Which we
Speaker 1 1:12
don't even have today because I got so many other ropes, and we had it during the nerds culinary University. I can still taste them in my mind's mouth. Absolutely. Those are great. Those are fantastic. Yeah. And then, you know, the more I started thinking about this idea of candy ropes. Oh, my God, I got into, like, a real semantic, oh, yeah, quandary. Because, you know, do are we going to count Twizzlers? Are we going to count Red Vines? You
Matthew Amster-Burton 1:35
know, think so. But then, like, where do you draw the line? Exactly,
Molly 1:39
because, so you know, those are marketed primarily as a licorice product, right? But as we're going to discuss, they also have products in the ropes category, yeah, and in categories that are called, like twists. And honestly, what's the difference between a vine and a rope and a twist. I think,
Matthew Amster-Burton 2:03
like, twizzle what? Yeah, what is the difference between a rope and a twizzle? I don't know, like the thing, like, first of all, I think my only memory lane, I was gonna say, like, I think I've had, like, a licorice rope. I think I think of a rope as being like, kind of like a smooth cylinder. And yet, if you think about rope in the real world, that's not what rope in the real world is like. Rope in the real world. That's right, not a Garth Brooks album before he became Chris Gaines.
Molly 2:36
Okay, well, here, I can't wait to start eating this stuff, but first we need a little bit of history. Okay, okay, so there is not a Wikipedia entry for candy ropes or any like sort of version of those two words.
Matthew Amster-Burton 2:48
Did you? Did you search for, like, sweet cylinders or like, like elongated sticky boys?
Molly 3:01
Oh, wow. Okay, all right, so instead of relying upon Wikipedia, I used Reddit a lot. Okay, so thank you. People have read it. So people there seem to think rope candy has been around for a while, and what they were sort of guessing was it had been around since the early 2000s okay, but just like us, they are confused about what rope candy signifies. I
Matthew Amster-Burton 3:24
know there is something called licorice ropes well on
Molly 3:27
so it seems like prior to the current era we're talking about here, there was a candy the Anthropocene, that's right, yeah, in the Pleistocene, in the Pleistocene, yep, the only product that anybody could point to, really, that was called rope of any sort, was a super rope.
Matthew Amster-Burton 3:48
I'm imagining someone trying to, trying to sling the insult, you're so old, you're ply sto,
Molly 3:54
okay, so super ropes. Okay, so the package, you can probably, you'll probably remember the package of this? Look it up. Yeah, look it up. So these come individually wrapped. It's a long red cylinder. In fact, it is 34 inches long, and it comes individually packaged. The packaging says super ropes, 34 inches of candy fun craving a blast from the past. So basically, it's just a very long red licorice. Okay,
Matthew Amster-Burton 4:22
this is basically the same as well what I'm
Molly 4:25
about. Okay, so hold on. I've got a lot to say about this candy, but basically what you need to know is that this candy, super ropes, is
Matthew Amster-Burton 4:34
made ropes are so much thinner than I imagine, was made
Molly 4:37
by the the same company that makes Red Vines. Okay? This company is called the American licorice company. It even says Red Vines on the package. That is one, right? Yeah. And so basically, Red Vines, because we're going to have to talk about Red Vines. Red Vines were introduced in 1950 Oh, okay, by the American licorice company, along with something called cinnamon twists and then red. Ropes, which were like a sibling product came along in 1963 from the same company. So we had Red Vines and then red ropes. And according to American licorice company, they say innovation wasn't about to end with Red Vines. Twists in 1963 new red ropes, candy and licorice ropes became the longest pieces of licorice to ever hit the market. Okay, so, but then it seems like I don't know so, so then super ropes were a thing, okay, for a while that were made by the red ropes company. But now it seems there's mostly only red ropes. I mean, such I'm tied up in so many knots here with these ropes. Okay,
Matthew Amster-Burton 5:39
couple of things, rope. Oh, yeah, yeah, of course. First of all, it took them 13 years to come up with the idea of making a licorice rope. Oh,
Molly 5:46
hold on. So let's talk about what might be the difference between this and a red vine. A red vine is hollow on the inside
Matthew Amster-Burton 5:53
if you bit the end off a red wine. Oh, wait, I'm like slobbering so much if you bit the end off a red vine, do you think you could slide these, one of these down the middle? Nope,
Molly 6:01
it's too narrow. Okay, so Wow. These are red ropes. Just tastes like Red Vines. It tastes like Red Vines. A lot of people on Reddit were getting all worked up about Super ropes, which is like a longer version of the red rope. Okay. They were saying that they felt really nostalgic for this candy. And so when they, as adults, like, went looking for it, and they found it online. They were sad to discover when they bought it that it now doesn't taste the same that it used to. They say now It tastes like Twizzlers or like plastic. To taste like
Matthew Amster-Burton 6:32
Twizzlers do taste like plastic and also like maybe they mean it tastes like the Pleistocene. I think they do. Yeah, I'm not going back for more red robes. Also like they, yeah, what do people like about these? They show these like, I'm looking for where it's like, you know, artist conception or something on the packaging. Because on the packaging it looks like these are going to be like three quarters of an inch in diameter, and they're actually like a quarter of an inch in diameter. That's
Molly 6:55
right, it looks like they're going to be short little lengths. They're like, Buca teeny thickness. No, they're thicker than Bucha tea. They're even a little thicker than, like, a number two pencil,
Matthew Amster-Burton 7:05
yeah, I guess so I feel like they're about number two pencil. No,
Molly 7:09
they're thicker. Okay, can I share with you some of the reviews? Oh, yeah, please. Okay, not the ropes of my youth. I really liked that one. Okay, here's another one. I will be returning the case I bought. Mine is one rope. Please go back to your original recipe.
Matthew Amster-Burton 7:25
Thanks for it. Thanks for clarifying. And then, you know, you should return the one you bit into. And then
Molly 7:30
I really like this one. I have eaten part of one when I opened the box excited, and the rest of it when my blood sugar went low and I had nothing else on hand. I've had them for months, and I just can't stomach them. It makes me so sad. Oh, yeah, that is sad. Yeah. I mean, if you had a case of these, would you, would you eat them?
Matthew Amster-Burton 7:49
No. And, like, I'm not even that big a fan of Red Vines, although Red Vines are way better than this, because they have, like, that kind of pull to them and the texture
Molly 7:58
you think, do you? Do you think red wine? Red wines. Do you think red wine is much better than that? Do you think red wines and Twizzler taste the same? Have we done this before? I
Matthew Amster-Burton 8:07
think we did do this. Like they No, they're not. They're quite different, at least in texture. Like, do they taste the same? Not exactly the same, but like, I mean, I don't think they taste like, as different as like, red wines. Red Forget it.
Molly 8:21
Okay, so Matthew, if we had, if we had them to taste, what I would have us taste next is a Twizzlers product called Twizzlers filled twist. Okay, now here's where we get back into semantics. Are these ropes? What the heck does the Twizzler end and the rope begin?
Matthew Amster-Burton 8:39
I wanna, okay, I wanna talk about this that I'm putting my hand on right here, because I think this is the closest thing to what you just said. But why not these other because this has filled in the name The thing that I notice about Twizzlers filled twists and this, which is airhead soft, filled bites, it doesn't say anywhere what they're filled with, isn't that weird? Ooh, soft, filled bite like, it's just, it's, you know, filled
Molly 9:06
like, what do you hope they're filled with before we start eating them? Tell me what you hope they're gold. But do you want to eat gold?
Matthew Amster-Burton 9:13
Well, I want to bite into it to prove that it's real gold. But okay, we'll be we'll be back after these messages while he's trying to open the package. So we don't have
Molly 9:25
any Twizzlers filled twists. So we're going to start with these soft, filled bites. Ooh, these feel pretty hard. Okay, have you felt them through the package? Oh,
Matthew Amster-Burton 9:33
it's like, it's a mass. It's like, it's, they've congealed, so like,
Molly 9:39
Whoa, it is a mass, okay. Oh, and they smell strong, okay, I'm pretty excited about I'm kind of excited about
Matthew Amster-Burton 9:47
these two, but like they're filled with some sort of white substance, but it does not say what it is. I think
Molly 9:53
we both know what it is. What do we think that? Okay? No, really, they're filled with, that's
Matthew Amster-Burton 10:02
good. They're sort of like sour patch kids, like, hmm, yeah, I like these. So
Molly 10:06
basically, it's like, it's like they had ropes and they cut them, right?
Matthew Amster-Burton 10:10
So are they still ropes after they've been cut into like, one inch lengths? All right? No, no. So why are we tasting these? The closest thing I could find Airheads ropes, which it may have been discontinued.
Molly 10:24
I really like, really tasty. Yeah, I really like that product. I'm trying
Matthew Amster-Burton 10:27
to figure out what's what this filling is. It doesn't list the filling separately on the on the package. And there's nothing really here that sounds like would make a white filling. So I don't know.
Molly 10:39
Let's see if we can take it off with our teeth. Okay, I mean, take off the colorful. Hold on. I'm gonna do it by the mic so you can, oh, wait, wait,
Matthew Amster-Burton 10:47
no, I've got one that's starting to peel here. I'm using my I'm using my thumb, where some would use their teeth. I go thumb. I don't know it's like, it's like, coming out in like, little chunks. So I now notice, like, everything I bought, except the red robes, is filled with some sort of white filling. What's happening this is, this is the best audio we've ever produced. Gabby, leave all of this in. It's just like, sitting trying to, like, pick out little bits of white filling with our fingers. Oh yeah,
Molly 11:19
I did it, I'm gonna eat it now. Okay, it tastes exactly like the outside. Yeah, it like dissolves faster. Though. I like this product. Really good, very silly product, though. Wow. Okay, so, so rope or not rope,
Matthew Amster-Burton 11:34
I guess I would say not rope. And here's and here's why, here's my basis for saying that if I said, help. I need a rope. And you brought me like a rope that had been chopped up into one inch segments. I would be very disappointed. Yeah, I would not, I would not anymore, right? These need these need to function as ropes like you should be able to lash your ship through the to the dock. Do
Molly 11:58
you think I could do some like nautical knot tying with these. I think,
Matthew Amster-Burton 12:02
I think so. I mean, it depends on the product, not with the air heads, a bowline knot. I could do a bowl. I think you could do a sheep shank. I think you do two half hitches. I think you could, whoa, whoa. Looks like a like a pan flute.
Molly 12:16
Okay, hold on. What we've got here is that I've opened the next product, which is the sweet, tart rope. This is in a twisted rainbow punch. Yeah. Now this looks rope this looks ropey. What does it mean exactly
Matthew Amster-Burton 12:29
when something is described as ropey, it's kind of one of the worst adjectives. Ooh,
Molly 12:33
the inside. Look at the texture. The texture. Look at it. It's kind of like marshmallow. I don't love the flavor on this one, like the flavor of the rainbow punch. I like the texture. Oh, I like this texture a lot. Yeah. I just drooled on my pants. It happens a lot on our show, like, straight up, drilled into my lap. Oh, I love the texture.
Matthew Amster-Burton 12:57
Yeah, the flavor is kind of growing on me, too. Me too. I want to get the Airheads ropes in, like, actual rope form, wow. Okay, biting off, like, knowing a length off a rope is very exciting, very satisfying. Yeah, exciting.
Molly 13:10
So these manners should be sour without having the citric acid on the outside, right? Not very good. They have just sort of a translucent, colorful, chewy candy on the outside that I would say is almost like texturally, it's between the inside of a jelly bean and a starburst. Yep, I don't know that there's another candy that has quite this texture, yeah, and it doesn't remind me of Sweet Tarts. No, it's a really nice sourness. All right. Well, we have another one. You're in luck. We've got the Fourth of July edition for all you patriots out there, we've got the red
Matthew Amster-Burton 13:44
like, there's actually really good timing, because it's August 14. Um, oh dear. Okay, hold on. I don't, I don't know if I would identify this as red, white and blue, if it didn't say it on the package. It's sort of like dark greenish blue and puce.
Molly 13:59
Okay? It's Tropical Punch flavored. This is not nearly as good as the rainbow punch. Oh, really, I don't think Hold on. Give it a second. I love the texture these. Texture is great. You're right. This is doing a weird facsimile of pineapple, yeah, and mango,
Matthew Amster-Burton 14:17
yeah? No, I'm not into this one. The texture is still great, but I don't like the flavor nearly as much as the other
Matthew Amster-Burton 14:30
one. We keep saying like, such and such is or isn't a rope. What is a rope? How often do you use rope in your day to day life?
Molly 14:38
Let's get into this. So I looked up rope, okay, on Merriam Webster. And I just want to clarify. I looked up only the noun, not the verb. I think you're just pronounced it Miriam Webster, like, like, I think that was my grandma's name. Is it? Merriam Webster? That's how I say it. Oh, I think I've always said Merriam Webster, weird. Okay, so there, there are a few different definitions of a rope. And. Let's see which one of these maybe resonates with us as we eat the Jolly Rancher. What is this? Called Jolly
Matthew Amster-Burton 15:05
Rancher ropes, watermelon and green apple. And it's like separate watermelon ropes from the green apple ropes. Wait,
Molly 15:11
let's talk about what these look like visually. These look the most like the packaging, absolutely. Yeah. So these are Whoa, like. Can you snip these in half? Sure? Can each have half of one? Wow. These are a really soft and sticky texture. Oh
Matthew Amster-Burton 15:27
yeah, the filling is like coming out. Oh,
Molly 15:30
whoa, whoa, hold on. Wow. This texture is, like, almost too soft and yeah, problem is is I'm having to chew it longer than the flavor is lasting. Yeah,
Matthew Amster-Burton 15:42
they do taste like watermelon Jolly Rancher, at least this one I'm eating, but the texture does not stand up to the Sweet Tarts or Airheads.
Molly 15:51
Hang on. I'm gonna try this green apple one. Well, the texture is too chewy or too soft. It's too soft. Yeah, the flavor peaks too soon? Yep, I need to cleanse my palate with an airhead filled bite. Oh, I don't care for that. Yeah. In the end, I truly feel like I'm eating a candle.
Matthew Amster-Burton 16:12
Should we try lighting it?
Molly 16:14
Let's try it. Yeah, okay. I'm gonna need some Airheads while you burn down the apartment.
Matthew Amster-Burton 16:23
If it actually lights, I'll drop it into my water glass here. Okay, what could possibly go wrong?
Molly 16:28
Okay, so we're gonna light a watermelon, Jolly Rancher rope on fire. Is there enough petroleum byproduct in this food? I
Matthew Amster-Burton 16:36
mean, there's sugar. It ignited briefly.
Molly 16:41
Oh, that smells so bad. It smells like singed hair, yeah. Oh, that smells.
Matthew Amster-Burton 16:49
These do look cool.
Molly 16:50
Oh, my God, Matthew, it smells like burning hair and plastic,
Matthew Amster-Burton 16:55
yeah. I mean, that's, that's weird. It seems like such a good idea. We just there should be a new segment.
Molly 17:04
Hey, wait, try lighting one of these on fire. Will it burn?
Matthew Amster-Burton 17:06
I think a red light was, it wasn't will it burn a thing I think of Will It Blend? But we can have our own segment. Will it burn? Where, whatever food we're talking about this week, we try and light it on fire. Last week we're talking about soup. It didn't Ignite. What is what is this? Oh, this is an original, like, red rope. Red rope. Okay, it's gonna smell just as bad. Seems a little bit flame retardant, though. Oh, yeah, this is, this is often used as a commercial flame retardant. Say you should dress
Molly 17:33
your children in red robes at bedtime. That would look awesome. Flame retardant pajamas. No, that smelled better, because really light, yeah. Okay, so we were trying to figure out what a rope is, yeah, basically you told me to start lighting things on fire. No, you came up with that idea, yeah, but you encouraged it. So number one, a rope is a large, stout cord of strands of fibers or wire twisted or braided together, okay,
Matthew Amster-Burton 18:00
so by that definition, like, I don't know if any of these are ropes. Well, no, no, I guess, I guess, like the sweet, tart ones seem sort of braided.
Molly 18:08
Okay, how about a long, slender strip of material used as a rope?
Speaker 2 18:12
Okay. I mean, the thing I think of, the thing I'm holding here, is like a long, slender strip of material, okay, you're holding an airhead, yeah. This is Airheads extreme. Oh, extremes. So this is, like, this is a candy that goes to extremes, but it doesn't say ropes. Doesn't say ropes, and it's not,
Molly 18:28
oh, a hangman's noose. It's another rope, okay, a lasso, all right, a row or string consisting of things united by or as if by braiding, twining or threading. That's
Matthew Amster-Burton 18:41
very high concept. Do you have an example of that one? Nope,
Molly 18:44
you could make a rope out of hair, sure. Rapunzel consisting of things united by or braided. I think
Matthew Amster-Burton 18:53
that last definition is what we're eating. Okay, like it's something that's kind of rope ish.
Molly 18:58
So what do we think about this as? Like a candy shape. I'm feeling unsure.
Speaker 2 19:03
Yeah, I want, I want to ear heads once in, like, full on rope form, not like, cut into little rope niblets, yeah. But what would that do for you? I like the idea of, like, holding a rope in my hand and gnawing pieces, then you would get the citric acid all over your fingers. But, I mean, I always, I always have citric acid on my fingers. I produce it naturally.
Molly 19:23
No, but really so like thinking about a Nerds Rope. Every time
Matthew Amster-Burton 19:26
I got inside, like children and dogs start going over and licking my fingers.
Molly 19:32
It curse. Hold on. I'm thinking about like the difference between nerds gummy clusters and Nerds Rope, because, as we decided on our nerds culinary universe episode, they taste exactly the same, yeah,
Matthew Amster-Burton 19:45
although I think we determined that the nerd fragments that they use on the ropes were slightly larger than on the gummy nuggets,
Molly 19:53
clusters, clusters. So what is the advantage of the rope delivery form? What. Well, I mean, for one thing, if you have a friend, you can, you can slap, you can, like, slap him with it. Oh, ow,
Matthew Amster-Burton 20:06
yeah, I slapped really hard. You're sorry now you slap your friend, yeah, slap me with a Ow. Okay, so that, I think, like, if you're a kid, that's probably the main thing, yeah, when you were a kid, like, did you ever snap each other with towels? Because that could be, like, actually dangerous. Um,
Molly 20:24
no, okay, I didn't hold on. I'm just seeing if I could make, like, a quick release knot. Oh, that's a good idea. Let's see what kinds of knots we can take these ropes. I mean, would you tie up your boat with?
Speaker 2 20:37
I would? I would tie up my boat with a with a Jolly Rancher candy rope. Okay, well, I've got a square knot here. I've lost a lot of boats. Can I do a slip I don't think it's long enough to do a slip knot, either. But interestingly, the band slip knot requires these in their rider backstage, yeah.
Matthew Amster-Burton 20:56
This is, this is actually really cute, like a Jolly Rancher rope that's been tied into like a regular old overhand knot.
Molly 21:02
I'm Yeah, I don't know that you can do anything with it except make just an overhand knot. So
Matthew Amster-Burton 21:09
it's maybe not as useful in the nautical context as you were hoping that's
Molly 21:14
right, yeah, hmm, huh. I mean, so what else is fun about this? Like Matthew, if you know. But why would you buy this? If you can buy nerds gummy clusters, for instance, why buy a Nerds Rope? Like, what? What do we think is happening there? Well,
Matthew Amster-Burton 21:30
I was, I was serious when I said, like, it's fun to hold a rope and bite the end off it, like it's just different from holding from, from popping a gummy cluster in your mouth. I remember much goopy stuff on my I remember liking the nerds ropes maybe better than the gummy clusters. I guess so,
Molly 21:45
right? I mean, I guess you're right. It's like, I don't know. I guess for as long as there have been humans eating food, there have been humans cutting their food into different shapes. I
Matthew Amster-Burton 21:55
mean, yeah, like, Why? Why would you make a linguini and not just a Penne? Right? We answered that question in our twin episodes, pasta lengths and pasta widths and pasta lengths. Yeah, yeah, okay, I'm a question for you, yeah, if you could take any candy and cause them to put out a rope version of it, what would you choose? I have an idea in mind, but I think we could turn this into a into a bigger discussion. Well, I'll start us hold up. Here's another question, yeah, but we didn't even answer my question,
Molly 22:27
okay? But wait, I was about to say, Pete on M M's, but then that rope, just like, becomes a Snickers bar. Do you know what I mean? Like, yeah. So I mean is, is a candy bar, the rope format of the of like the mini size of that thing. So
Matthew Amster-Burton 22:47
what you're asking is, is a regular Snickers bar, the rope version of fun size stickers. This is the best question I've ever heard. I'm asking you completely. Understood. We just got PhDs in philosophy, they just, like, fell on the table. Like, like, diplomas.
Molly 23:12
Like, Wait, do diplomas just fall on the table all the time? It's like that pop song
Matthew Amster-Burton 23:18
I was there's a pop song called diplomas. No, it's raining diplomas. Raining diplomas. Yeah, hallelujah. Okay, my so I was gonna ask, is a tootsie roll a candy rope?
Molly 23:31
Oh, no. Do you think they make Tootsie ropes? I don't see
Matthew Amster-Burton 23:37
why they wouldn't, right. Must google it. Okay, I don't know where my phone went. It may just be encrusted with candy ropes. Okay, my idea was also Eminem related, that I want a mini m m's rope that's like a tootsie roll or something, some kind of sticky chocolate with a bunch of mini M M stuck to it in rope form. Yeah.
Molly 23:56
I mean, why don't they Tootsie rope? What if they make a long candy, like chocolate candy cylinder. This basically an M, M, but the shape of a wand.
Matthew Amster-Burton 24:07
So what I have here is Tootsie Roll, Tootsie rope toys for dogs. I don't think this has any Well, Tootsie
Molly 24:16
Roll, people. I mean, you should get on this, yeah? Like 34 inches of Tootsie fun,
Matthew Amster-Burton 24:22
yeah. Like, give us, give us 34 inches of Tootsie fun. And like to to the snickers Corporation, start advertising regular Snicker bars, Snickers bars as fun size snicker ropes, and make Snickers singular. For some reason, even though it's gonna, like, wreck your trademark this, I put, like the two, the two ropes that we tried to set on fire, I put into my water glass, and I go, What the fuck is going on?
Molly 24:50
I'm trying to get these knots off my agenda, and they're just keep sticking to it. Sorry. What were you saying? Oh,
Matthew Amster-Burton 24:56
that when I look over like these, these burnt. Like burnt at one end, it looks like I put out a couple of cigarettes in my water glass. It's kind of sad. And then I also keep reaching for a drink of water because I keep eating more candy.
Molly 25:10
Okay, do we have anything else to say? I mean, do we like this? Not
Matthew Amster-Burton 25:15
really like I think the airhead sour filled bites are my favorite. We determined they weren't ropes. Yes, the answer is no, we don't like candy ropes, but if nerds ropes, except nerds ropes and like, like, but they should like the candy people should keep at it. Yeah, keep going. You'll hit on something like, I want an O Henry rope, or, like, a craft caramel rope. That actually sounds pretty good, right? Yeah, that could be a good basis for, like, sticking something else onto that. Like, what about a log of craft caramel with just, like, chocolate sprinkles.
Molly 25:49
I was thinking, like, ants on a long maybe raisins, yeah, maybe raisins
Matthew Amster-Burton 25:53
or currants, right? Do it? Do we have any segments? Yeah, we, like we got to the bottom of this, of this candy.
Molly 26:02
So glad we cleared this. Okay, we've got some spilled mail.
Matthew Amster-Burton 26:15
It's from listener Shelly and and this one, this one is a serious topic, dear Molly and Matthew in your Italian sodas two episode, you were wondering how Wells work. God, I love our listeners. Yes, me too. I'm a middle school science teacher, and since teaching people who don't necessarily care, slash, need to know about Wells is literally part of my job, I thought I'd write in listener jelly, how dare you? What if we really need to know about well,
Molly 26:39
okay, okay, okay. All right. Here it goes. All right. Wells draw
Matthew Amster-Burton 26:43
on groundwater, which is the water held underground between soil particles and in pores and crevices in rock. A large amount of groundwater is called an aquifer, and groundwater gets recharged by precipitation. The top of the groundwater is called the water table, and if the land dips below the level of the water table, you'll get surface water like a pond, or on a slope, it'll be a spring. Did not know that if you dig a hole below the water table, the groundwater will flow into that hole up to the level of the water table at a pump, or, if you're old school, a bucket on a string and you got a well. Matthew was correct that this water is somewhat purified by being filtered through sediment. Wow. Lizard Shelley said my favorite words. Matthew was correct, though. These days, additional purification steps are added to Wells used for drinking water. If you want to figure out where to dig a new well, your state geological survey can tell you how deep nearby wells are, which will give you a good idea of how deep you'll need to dig. Please enjoy this truly inspired song about groundwater, but be warned, it will get stuck in your head, and we'll link to it in the in the show notes. I listened to some of it, and it's a very catchy song about groundwater. I
Molly 27:48
definitely would like to listen to it. Cheers. Listener.
Matthew Amster-Burton 27:51
Shelly, Wow, isn't that amazing? Still
Molly 27:53
just so fascinating. Like, like, there's just, like, water down there. And
Matthew Amster-Burton 27:57
what? There's just water down there? Well, I mean, I did kind of know there was, there was underground water, but, like, this put together, like, a whole bunch of different concepts that I didn't know how to relate. Like, a aquifer, the water table, ground water, a spring.
Molly 28:11
I wish I could go back and do middle school science again, usually just
Matthew Amster-Burton 28:15
like, go down to a local middle school and ask, I should, I should? Like, I could just Billy Madison. Is that the movie where Adam Sandler has to go back to school? I'm not
Molly 28:25
sure. Okay, okay, okay, yeah, wow, wow.
Matthew Amster-Burton 28:31
You have Billy Madison syndrome and ask if you can go into science class. Okay, wow, wow. Yeah, that was, that was intense. What
Molly 28:39
I also want to know is like, how do teachers learn all this stuff? Like, I
Matthew Amster-Burton 28:43
mean, they probably have to go to school themselves. But
Molly 28:46
then, you know, of course, they've got to keep learning these things. I mean, I guess, like all of us, they're doing. You think there's
Matthew Amster-Burton 28:51
like, new, new stuff that middle schoolers need to know about, groundwater,
Molly 28:55
grounded water, but like, about all kinds of other things that's
Matthew Amster-Burton 28:59
true, like continuing education credits. They have to get those. I know,
Molly 29:03
yeah, they like, go and learn about generative AI or, or, like, fracking, fracking, like, what, what constitutes a rope Yes, yeah. Like, I would sign up for that continue a ropes course. You
Matthew Amster-Burton 29:17
could call it, yeah. Did you ever do a ropes course? Go do a ropes course. No one of one of like, my worst memories, is doing a ropes course. Wait a minute. Next corporate retreat, no where. There's no way we're doing a ropes course. I'm gonna do a trust
Molly 29:30
fall in just you're gonna catch me. No, that's terrifying, and we need more people. All
Matthew Amster-Burton 29:36
right, yeah. All right. Listeners, you're all invited course with us. It'll be in the forest. You know where to go, meet us in the forest. I'm
Molly 29:46
psyched about this, but why don't you want to do it? Because it's too scary, but we're grown ups now. We're not gonna die. Most
Matthew Amster-Burton 29:53
people who die are grown ups doing ropes. Scores, no, but they but, but some of them much less interesting things that that is, that is 100 beds, but I would cry like, you're right, I wouldn't die doing a rope scores, but, but if you made me do ropes course, I would cry, really, I think so. Remember, okay, remember when you when we had to cross a bridge over a river in the Yukon I think, I think it may have been the Yukon River.
Molly 30:28
Oh, that's right. And wow, I wish we had made an audio recording of that. It was one of our, like, most intense moments together. It was, yeah, you were, like, walking right behind me, and where were you looking,
Matthew Amster-Burton 30:41
I think, just like at the floor, okay, or maybe, and you
Molly 30:45
need back, you needed me to walk a certain speed, not faster or slower. And we were, we were just getting across,
Matthew Amster-Burton 30:51
right? So imagine that only worse, okay, I forgot about, like I would, not only, not only would I cry, but I would ruin your ropes course experience. So you you and Abby could do the rev scars. I'm sure Abby would love this idea. It happens in nature.
Molly 31:07
Okay, well, that's Abby, our producer, Abby circatella, can rate
Matthew Amster-Burton 31:10
and review us wherever you get your podcast. Wow, that was a great, great segue, I
Molly 31:15
know, wasn't it? And you can chat with other spilled milk listeners at reddit.com/r/everything,
Matthew Amster-Burton 31:21
spilled milk with some listener, please start a thread called what is a rope? Yes, yes, please. And until next time, thank you for listening to spilled milk, the show that is filled
Molly 31:35
Yep, no, we are
Matthew Amster-Burton 31:36
filled with waste, legally embargoed from saying more. That's what that word means. I'm Matthew Amster Burton. I'm
Unknown Speaker 31:47
filled,
Molly 31:54
and I think we're gonna, you try, okay, okay. I mean, I'm just,
Matthew Amster-Burton 32:01
yeah, we're gonna need scissors.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai